The Inside World of an Outsider

Andrea V. Parra Jaimes, MS3

Have you ever felt like an outsider? At some point, people feel out of place, an isolating feeling. It has been a recurring emotion, no matter the country I seem to reside in. I could try to describe the feeling for people who have never experienced it before. But, instead, I can do better: I will explain it in the hopes of gaining perspective. I was born in Caracas, Venezuela, a country that, not too long ago, had everything to offer to not only its citizens but also the rest of the world. I grew up surrounded by family. My weekends were filled with lively events; my community was alive. I can recall holidays at my grandma’s cooking while my cousins ran around the house belly-laughing. I can feel the hot sun on my skin during the summers at Chichiriviche and on the island of Margarita. I breathed in the air and viewed the most beautiful beaches with incredibly transparent waters and the whitest sands, all in my home of Venezuela.

Then, something changed; the home I knew turned into a nightmare, leaving me grappling with a new fate. Caracas as a whole became dangerous as the effects of leadership rippled into my town with the ring of gunshots and threats of kidnapping. The news plastered headlines with heart-shattering stories of killings, kidnappings, muggings, and safety gone from my dreams. I still remember the fear racing through my veins as I was followed by another car after coming home from dinner. I can hear the sound of a gun banging against the car window and asking for our jewelry. These were stories for everyone in my hometown, and they became typical while I felt out of place, clinging to the hope of safety again. Finally, my parents made the brave decision to leave for the unknown, hoping for a new beginning on another side of the world.

I felt different in my home country, wanting more opportunities and safety. Later, however, a new dynamic emerged, my accent. The way I spoke was the first thing someone pointed out to me. Some people liked it, others did not, and many classified me as an outsider because of it. My Spanish had always sounded the same to me, but in Madrid, Spain, it was something my classmates and others were curious about. Nonetheless, my parents taught me that I should be very proud of where I came from, so I championed my cultural background with no fear. The distinction between my Venezuelan background and the Spanish customs growing in me became my unique identity. As I adapted rapidly to language and dialect, my global perspective and cultural knowledge expanded tremendously due to all the opportunities offered while studying in Madrid. I could not identify as Spanish or Venezuelan, and my sense of patriotism for either country was obliterated and lost somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I adapted to the point where I did not want to be classified as different anymore.

As soon as I found my footing in an unknown place, I moved to the United States for my undergraduate studies. I met so many people from all over the world that wanted to share their culture proudly. This encouraged me to connect and find my place in a different world, to own my experience. While working on my degree, I found a passion for medicine when volunteering at senior homes and hospitals. It heightened while doing missionary work on the island of Nassau, the Bahamas, and the town of Escazu, Costa Rica. These first encounters with the medical field opened the doors for me to global medicine and the improvement and work needed to achieve health equity and better healthcare services. Throughout the years and due to the experiences in the countries I have lived in, I have built incredible tolerance, understanding, and acceptance towards others’ backgrounds and cultures, which has allowed me to see and treat people differently.

As a third-year medical student in Caguas, Puerto Rico, I have witnessed the lack of resources and information regarding disparities, especially in women’s health. As I look into the future, I am incredibly motivated and enthusiastic about continuing my medical training and learning more about impacting underserved areas worldwide in my future practice. My goal is to become a part of a group of highly qualified physician-scientists who positively influence women of different ages and diverse backgrounds. I want to focus on those women who require medical attention and deserve the most up-to-date information to answer their questions and discuss their treatment options. In addition, I want my patients to feel that they can trust their healthcare professionals and the medical process.

When someone asks where I am from, I now proudly explain how I was born in a country where macaws and toucans come to greet you at your window, how I grew up in another country that allowed me to expand my horizons and to fall in love with education and their healthcare system, how my dreams became a reality after having moved to a country that offered me opportunities without questions, and how I now live with my Caribbean neighbors, in the beautiful island of Puerto Rico, surrounded by beaches that do not have anything to envy to those mentioned above. The reason why I decided to go into medicine not only lies in my passion for science but also in the understanding and connection I want to provide to my future patients. They all have a story that deserves to be heard and needs to be respected. Thus, I decided to turn my differences into strengths, which will allow me to empathetically and fearlessly care for my patients in the future. Thank you, mom and dad, you were both right all along.

About the Author:

Andrea V. Parra Jaimes is a third year medical student at San Juan Bautista School of Medicine. She was born in Caracas, Venezuela and moved to the United States at the age of 18. She currently lives in Puerto Rico while completing her medical studies. She is an advocate of women's and reproductive health and aspires to become an OBGYN in the near future. She enjoys travelling, reading, and meeting new people.

About the Work:This piece portrays my personal experience after Ieaving my home country of Venezuela and consequently struggling when trying to find my place as a foreigner.